If you’re reading this, it means I made it and am clicking the morphine button like mad, possibly barfing my brains out and can’t really move, let alone type. I’m gonna be golden in a day or two (or five) and my best friend Christine is posting this for me.
How did I do? I just followed my best friend Sofia’s instructions:
And I did… and they wheeled me outta there like a boss.
Even if I haven’t had a chance to respond, I’ve seen and read every call, text, email and comment. You’ve surprised me, helped me and lifted me up. “Love actually IS all around.” I couldn’t be more blessed.
I’ll be recovering on Long Island for the foreseeable future. Until next time…
[OUTAKES FROM ALL OF MY GOLDEN GIRLS — THEY ARE THE REASON I I LIVE]
Be like Freddie Mercury opening night in Montreal
Be like Bret Michaels on the Rock of Love bus
Be like 50 Cent without his bulletproof vest
Go in there like when T-Rex was the king of the dinosaurs
Go in there like when BIG was the king of rap
Go in there like when Billy Joel when he made Uptown Girl
Go in there like when Julia Roberts went back to Rodeo drive after those bitches dissed her (#winner)
Go in there like Jeremy Lin on the Knicks in 2012
Be like Enimem at the end of 8 mile
Go in there like Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting when he “got her numba… how do you like them apples” (those pretentious, preppy Harvard punks)
Go in there like Nitro from the 1980s American Gladiators
Go in there like Kevin Bacon in Footloose
Go in there like Missy Misdemeanor Elliot rapping “Work It” in 2002
Go in there like Forrest Gump running across the country
Go in there like any time Matt Damon was Jason Bourne, ever
Go in there like Henry Hill in Goodfellas (Karen, we needed that!)
Go in there like Katniss Everdeen in the Hunger Games
If you EVER need a good pre-mastectomy pep rally, my girls got you.#Golden #BitchesBeCrazy ❤